What The F**k Moments

It’s just past ten in the morning and already we’ve had a few of those “What The Fuck?!” moments. These moments are usually a daily occurrence and have been happening more and more the older my daughter gets. I know most of them are half my fault, but it doesn’t mean I’m not like, “What. the. fuck.?” when they happen.

Today it started at breakfast. My daughter loves to feed our dog and this morning when she was done with her toast she tossed it over the side of her high chair and I later see Jax (our dog) licking away at it. Whatever… I’ve given up on Jax not getting table scraps. About ten minutes later my husband gets Bradley (our daughter) out of her high chair while I’m doing dishes and when I turn around Bradley is chomping away at Jax’s piece of toast. Gross. She swallows it. WTF?!

About 9:30am I’m cleaning out the cabinets and empty the broken, bottom of the bag crackers into one of Bradley’s baby bowls. She wants to eat them so she sits down on the floor and is being adorable while she crunches away at them. As soon as I turn away she dumps them everywhere and is swinging her arm back and forth spreading them all over the floor.WTF?! Why?

So I have to vacuum, but apparently the vacuum is so much fun when I have it in my hand that Bradley wants it in her hand, too. WTF? Why is it only fun when I have it? So we vacuum the floor together and 25 minutes later it’s semi-clean.

Other major WTF?! moments that haven’t happened today, but have in the past…

  1. That time I put Bradley down for a nap in just her diaper because it was so hot  (huge mistake that will never be repeated) and when I got her a couple hours later she was playing in her own poop. She had it smeared everywhere and was having a jolly ol’ time playing in it. WTF?
  2. The times when she wants to walk in the street (with traffic) and I don’t let her so she throws a fit the size of Texas because walking with traffic must be so much more fun than walking on the sidewalk. WTF?!
  3. When she really, really needs a drink of water and I get her baby cup out and cut a straw to baby size. (She refuses to drink out of a sippy cup.) I hold the baby cup, but she won’t take a drink unless she is holding it. WTF? So I let her hold it and she does great… until I turn around (I have too much to do during the day to just sit and watch her drink water) within a few minutes she spills it everywhere and plays in it. WTF?!
  4. When she is eating food and wants to shove as much of it in as her little mouth can hold. Why? WTF?
  5. When she picks up her toy basket and dumps it everywhere and then walks away. WTF?

After I get over the initial shock of these moments I can realize a couple of things… If she made a mess it’s not the end of the world… When she wants to do things on her own she’s being independent (which is one of my goals with raising my daughter)…  She is curious and wants to figure out what stuff is and how it works, which is a good sign for the future.

The picture below ∨ is the perfect example of a “What the fuck?” moment. (By some miracle I had my phone out when I walked into the room and was able to snap a quick pic before I started gagging and took her to the tub.)

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Need It… thredUP! 5 Reasons To Not Buy Toddlers New Clothes. Instead Buy Secondhand!

A few reasons why I don’t waste money buying my toddler new clothes, but instead buy secondhand…

  1. She couldn’t give two shits about how she looks or what she wears.
  2. She’s messy.
  3. She’s dirty.
  4. She’s constantly touching and rubbing gross stuff on herself.
  5. She grows fast.

thredUP! Online Consignment and Thrift Shop

I am not embarrassed to admit that I buy a lot of clothes from Goodwill, Savers, and Kohl’s clearance section.  (Why spend more money then you have to?) Always looking for a good deal led me to this amazing new online secondhand store called thredUP!  

thredUP! is The Largest Online Consignment and Thrift Shop.  Since shopping with a toddler freaking sucks, an online thrift shop I was a godsend.

I was a little weary at first, but after ordering from them once my fears were gone. All the clothes were in great shape, pretty true to size, and looked awesome! Even better you get 40% off your first order and free shipping on all orders over $79! Another great perk of the site (Because I love buying myself clothes more than buying my one-year-old clothes) there’s an adult section!

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was $110 now $28.99

 

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was $20 now $6.99

 

Not interested in buying secondhand, but have a closet full of old baby clothes? You can also sell to thredUP! Why not make a little cash for that next ridiculously expensive baby outfit?

 

FIND THRIFT SHOPS IN YOUR AREA

Goodwill stores have a great selection of baby, toddler, and young children clothes.

Savers has a great selection of clothing if you are lucky enough to have one in your area. My personal favorite.

The website thriftstore.net is an amazing way to find ALL the thrift stores and secondhand shops in your area!

My Husband Going Grocery Shopping With the Baby vs. Me

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It blows my mind how my husband can go to the store or anywhere with Bradley and  ‘women instinctively flock like the salmon of Capistrano’ to him. Seriously though… it’s like women can smell ‘daddy’ or ‘husband material’ radiating off him.  (It also doesn’t hurt that he is buff and looks pretty good in his tight T’s ;)

He always says, “They were just being nice. It’s not like they were hitting on me…” And I’m left thinking about how blind and naive men can be.

I go out with my baby and I literally repel men… they run in the other direction. You would think I was radiating ‘be my baby’s daddy’ or ‘marry me on the third date’ . Unlike my husband’s experiences, I would never have a man come up to me, being nice, and say, “Oh …she’s cute. How old is she? What’s her name? blah blah blah.” I don’t need a man to hit on me to feel good about myself, but it never sucks to feel hot.

Update on my grocery getting experiences… We are in Germany. Very rarely does anyone even look at you and nod, much less actually stop say Hi and make small talk. (It just isn’t the German way, I guess.) My husband comes home from the grocery store with our daughter and tells me about how everyone at the market was telling her how cute she was and just loving on her. I’m thinking WTF?! I can’t get someone to smile at me even when I look them in the eyes and smile at them!

I always assumed most women were like me in that when I saw a man with a baby I just saw baggage (No Thank You) I have been proven wrong. Women love man with baby.

Bradley Is One!

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Our little girl is One!! I can not believe just a short year ago I was in writhing pain and so sad because all I wanted to do was be able to hold, snuggle and love on my little girl. I have definitely made up for those first few days with hours and hours of loving on my little angel. While I couldn’t keep my Sim babies alive to save my life I am doing a pretty awesome job with this one!!

So This Shit Happened

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It’s a good thing I enjoy cleaning because the job is never ending. If it isn’t dinner all over the floor, it’s her new interest that involves taking everything from where it belongs and spreading it all over the floor. On the plus side Bradley is learning to feed herself!

 

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So this shit happened the other day. Definitely something I never thought I would see or have to clean. Note that she wasn’t crying the entire time. She was actually having a grand ole time playing in her poo and when I walked in she showed me the poop on her hands like it was a play toy.  Not until I yelled, “Oh My….Shit!” and slightly panicked did she start crying.

“It happens…” “What? Shit” “Sometimes…” -Forrest Gump